Tuesday 24 May 2011

Visca el Barça !

Parts of Manchester earlier today resembled Berlin circa. 1940. The worlds' media had gathered at the Manchester Utd facility of physical excellence in Carrington ahead of the Champions League Final in London on Saturday. Obergruppenfuhrer Ferguson was available for limited questions. 

Instructions had to be obeyed - strictly no questions relating to anything other than the Champions League Final. What could they possibly mean? Their plan was  being meticulously executed - until one journalist had the fatal temerity to ask how important Ryan Giggs would be to the team on Saturday given that he is the most experienced Champions League player in the clubs' history.

To the sound of automatic weapons being readied, Ferguson leaned over to his Propaganda Officer Fräulein Shotbolt (that's her real name - honestly) and menacingly demanded to know the identity of the schweinehund before ordering that he be banned from the next press conference on Friday. That is of course, if he survives.

Because whilst all this was going on, down the road in affluent Worsley, press photographers gathered outside the mansion belonging to Ryan Giggs were being attacked, intimidated and their vehicles trashed by masked men. These would no doubt be the same moronic men in black who gathered outside the Rooney mansion last year to persuade that player he might want to reconsider his ill advised transfer request.

Still, as the fans sing, ad nauseum, in the red half of the city - "we're Man Utd and we do what we want". They most certainly do - from the top right down to the pond life at the bottom.

So much for the free press

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